I'm in my 34th week of pregnancy, and up until now, it has been a wonderfully easy pregnancy, from what I understand with talking to other women who have gone through the experience. I have yet to go through any hint of the morning sickness some women go through and the only true complaint I have so far is that I'm incredibly tired, either from insomnia or just my body working hard to support the little one. But being unemployed gave me the freedom to nap whenever I wanted. And I've been able to keep most of my hormonal emotions in check, no irrational mood swings, and 'pregnant brain' hasn't really affected me too badly. And even now that Baby Girl is started to fight against the restraints of such tight quarters which results in mild to HOLY-CRAP discomfort, it usually passes fairly quickly, and I can't really blame her - I wouldn't want to be smushed like that either.
The problem I've been dealing with in the last month or so, is fighting the urge to break out into tears because I feel like a big, honking zeppelin. Intellectually, I knew that my size would change and all of these changes are part of the beautiful process of creating life. Well, that's all nice and good for a greeting card, but hearing the unsympathetic words of the OB doctor whom I've seen the last two appointments just makes me feel swollen like a blob, not with the joy of a soon to be motherhood (especially when his words are, "You've gained 10 pounds in the last month; what happened there?" Insensitive mofo.)
The swollen feet and ankles don't bother me (actually, it's really quite amusing to me to see the change in sizes from day to day) as much as just catching a glimpse of myself in the mirror or trying to kneel or put on socks. It is then when I realize that all of the weight I have been putting on is preventing me from feeling anywhere near normal. And being a petite person, going from 125 to 180 in a year is hella scary.
I know that there is a significant portion of the weight that will be taken care of once I give birth and the fact that I plan to breastfeed also will help matters. But after the childbirth, I wanted to start putting together the wedding celebration plans that Scott and I never got to elaborate on in July. The thought of trying to find a wedding dress in my current state of mass just makes me think of Kirby in a off-white frock (Nintendo fans, anyone?)
My loving husband has been exceedingly supportive and soothing to my insecurities. He's a saint for doing so. And for the few I've spoken to about this specific dent to my self image, they have also been nice and understanding. I try to take their words as more than sweet words of reassurance. But it's hard to fight the scale and the reflection in the mirror.
Wednesday, December 29, 2010
Tuesday, December 21, 2010
Hush, little baby, don't say a word, Mama's going to buy you a mockingbird
Ok - that's not real. I do not want a mockingbird. That darn thing will sit there and mimic all kinds of nonsense, only adding to the noise I anticipate with Baby Girl's symphony of sounds.
What I would like to provide are the baby registries that I have (at long last!) finalized for this little one. Since I probably won't have a baby shower until after she's born, I don't quite know what the etiquette is for letting people know that we have a list of material wants and needs. So, I figure that this would be the easiest way to let people know, if they so choose to check it out.
If there are any questions, give me a shout either on my email or my Facebook. If you don't know how to contact me on either one of those mediums, I guess drop a comment here and I'll get back to you =)
Happy Holidays, if I don't get to post before Christmas passes. I hope everyone will be warm and surrounded by love.
Amazon registry
Target registry
Babies R Us registry
What I would like to provide are the baby registries that I have (at long last!) finalized for this little one. Since I probably won't have a baby shower until after she's born, I don't quite know what the etiquette is for letting people know that we have a list of material wants and needs. So, I figure that this would be the easiest way to let people know, if they so choose to check it out.
If there are any questions, give me a shout either on my email or my Facebook. If you don't know how to contact me on either one of those mediums, I guess drop a comment here and I'll get back to you =)
Happy Holidays, if I don't get to post before Christmas passes. I hope everyone will be warm and surrounded by love.
Amazon registry
Target registry
Babies R Us registry
Friday, December 17, 2010
I could have saved so much time for us, Had I seen the way to get to where I am today
I have been very negligent about keeping this blog current, though I have thought of a great deal of many things to write about in the last several weeks. Being that I don't want this to be solely dedicated to my pregnancy, I think it's high time to rewind a bit and tell the story of how I met my husband.
Our story isn't a short one to tell. And it's because of my doing - mostly. You know when people (and I have said this myself on occasion) say, "If only I could talk to a younger version of myself, things would have worked out smoother."? Well, when my life's path really started looking clearer, this is what I used to believe. Until I really thought about and knew that would be too much of a gimmie.
Scott and I have known each other pretty much since I graduated high school. He's four years older and went to the sister high school, so it was actually through mutual friends and our shared interest in stage work for the local theater group that brought us in the same circles. We would end up at the same gatherings, laugh over the same silly jokes and generally have a good time whenever around each other.
It wasn't until after he decided to join the Air Force when anything started coming to light. When he finished basic training, he made several calls to friends just to catch us up on how the experience had been going for him and I remember his phone call and the fact that we spoke for nearly 2 hours. His first base assignment was in Germany so we didn't see him for a long stretch of time. One of the first times he came back, we were having a huge party and after several different drinking games (and some help from the Captain), I found out that there had been a crush brewing. I was flattered, however I was in another relationship at the time and that was all that could be done at the time. This was 8 years ago.
Time passed and Germany changed to a hotter, sandier place in the Middle East. While he was stationed there, he and I emailed each other, mostly because both of us were so bored. Since the usual format of sharing what happened in our day to day was not really worth writing about, I started a format of asking a question concerning anything of his life and then waiting to hear the answer with a question from him at the end of his email. This exchange lasted through his time in the Middle East and his return to Germany. We covered many different subjects and really got to know each other. This lasted a better part of two years.
By the time 2004 rolled around, I was single and we decided it was time to try dating. Our dating consisted of a lot of phone dates, emailing, a couple of weddings and precious little time spent in the same time zone, but I remember having a wonderful courtship. Sadly, this came to an end when his assignment changed from North Dakota to Idaho, because I took that as a sign that timing wasn't on our side. This brings us to early 2006.
Even while we were no longer together, we kept a friendship and would see each other at several different weddings. I was dating a different guy, but all the while I knew in the back of my mind that Scott would always be special to me.
But it wasn't until early summer of 2009 that I realized that he was more than just a special past relationship. He was THE relationship. It took a little while longer, a break-up and a loss of a job in Tennessee for me to finally be free to have my long awaited chance with Scott, who had been patiently waiting for me all along.
It took us this long to finally have the relationship we were always meant to have. And even though we've experienced uneven pacing, neither one of us could be happier about where we are now. Finally together, expecting a baby daughter and incredibly, unbelievably happy.
Our story isn't a short one to tell. And it's because of my doing - mostly. You know when people (and I have said this myself on occasion) say, "If only I could talk to a younger version of myself, things would have worked out smoother."? Well, when my life's path really started looking clearer, this is what I used to believe. Until I really thought about and knew that would be too much of a gimmie.
Scott and I have known each other pretty much since I graduated high school. He's four years older and went to the sister high school, so it was actually through mutual friends and our shared interest in stage work for the local theater group that brought us in the same circles. We would end up at the same gatherings, laugh over the same silly jokes and generally have a good time whenever around each other.
It wasn't until after he decided to join the Air Force when anything started coming to light. When he finished basic training, he made several calls to friends just to catch us up on how the experience had been going for him and I remember his phone call and the fact that we spoke for nearly 2 hours. His first base assignment was in Germany so we didn't see him for a long stretch of time. One of the first times he came back, we were having a huge party and after several different drinking games (and some help from the Captain), I found out that there had been a crush brewing. I was flattered, however I was in another relationship at the time and that was all that could be done at the time. This was 8 years ago.
Time passed and Germany changed to a hotter, sandier place in the Middle East. While he was stationed there, he and I emailed each other, mostly because both of us were so bored. Since the usual format of sharing what happened in our day to day was not really worth writing about, I started a format of asking a question concerning anything of his life and then waiting to hear the answer with a question from him at the end of his email. This exchange lasted through his time in the Middle East and his return to Germany. We covered many different subjects and really got to know each other. This lasted a better part of two years.
By the time 2004 rolled around, I was single and we decided it was time to try dating. Our dating consisted of a lot of phone dates, emailing, a couple of weddings and precious little time spent in the same time zone, but I remember having a wonderful courtship. Sadly, this came to an end when his assignment changed from North Dakota to Idaho, because I took that as a sign that timing wasn't on our side. This brings us to early 2006.
Even while we were no longer together, we kept a friendship and would see each other at several different weddings. I was dating a different guy, but all the while I knew in the back of my mind that Scott would always be special to me.
But it wasn't until early summer of 2009 that I realized that he was more than just a special past relationship. He was THE relationship. It took a little while longer, a break-up and a loss of a job in Tennessee for me to finally be free to have my long awaited chance with Scott, who had been patiently waiting for me all along.
It took us this long to finally have the relationship we were always meant to have. And even though we've experienced uneven pacing, neither one of us could be happier about where we are now. Finally together, expecting a baby daughter and incredibly, unbelievably happy.
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